Robyn Brown: My Body is Mine

04/29/2013

Sister-wives-robyn-blog-11Robyn Brown of Sister Wives is Kody's fourth wife. Follow along as she shares her perspective on the intriguing world of a sister wife.

People often tell me that I am lucky because I don't struggle with my weight. I don't know what to say to them because I feel like weight is only one part of a person’s health and body image. All my life most of my family has struggled with weight and health issues. Obesity actually runs in my family. I am very sensitive to people who struggle with these issues because I watched my family members go through so much heartbreak over them.

I think sometimes people assume that if you aren't overweight then your health is automatically good and you have it made. That isn't necessarily true. Let me explain. I don't enjoy food. I get grossed out regularly by it. I have to remind myself to eat or I will all of a sudden start falling apart. My hunger alerts are broken. I also have a tendency to be hypoglycemic and no matter what, I am anemic. I have not felt in control of my body most of my life. It hasn't been easy for me.

With the goal to take better care of our bodies this year, my sister wife Meri and I decided to take a yoga class. When my instructor did an assessment of me, she looked me up and down and said I needed a year of yoga to be healthy again and that my body was not happy. I felt like I had failed a test.

As I started showing up to the class I became more aware of what she was talking about. There were people in the same class who were older than me that were more flexible and weren't winded by the workout!

One morning while I was doing a Sleeping Tiger yoga pose (laying on my back with my arms and legs sticking straight up in the air), my instructor decided that we were going to hold the pose for a while. Uh yea...for a long while! My legs and arms starting burning and falling down. I couldn't do it, so I started cheating. When she wasn't looking I would drop my arms and legs for a frantic minute to get some relief. Suddenly, she walked towards me, plopped herself down right next to me and smacked my legs and arms into the right position. I almost laughed out loud. I had been caught and she was going to make sure I did it right.

She started calmly repeating "I am not my body. MY BODY IS MINE." I lay there struggling to keep my arms and legs in the air as she continued to prohibit me from cheating, and I began to mull over the words she was saying. If I wasn't my body and my body was mine then I should be in control -- I just had to decide to take the wheel back. It was such an amazing thought! I started telling my legs and arms they were mine. I stopped listening to them complain about how they hurt and were tired. I told them I was in charge and that this little test would be over soon, but I would say when. It became mind over matter and I felt very calm and strong! I felt in charge of my body for first time in a long time and that felt good. I left the class excited and invigorated. I am looking forward to gaining back the control over my body and really taking care of it, because it is mine!

 

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About the Authors

Sister Wives explores the lives of Kody Brown and his four wives, Meri, Janelle, Christine and Robyn. Join Janelle and Robyn Brown as they blog about the ins and outs of their lives as sister wives.
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