Being a Father

12/05/2011

Note from the TLC Editors: This week, Nader Aoude talks about becoming a father for the first time with his wife Nawal. Take a look at Naseem's baby album, check out some of the video highlights from the show All-American Muslim Video and join the conversation on the All-American Muslim Facebook page!

 

“Being a father is a great experience, so enjoy it.”  This was the response my father gave to me when I asked him what it was like being a dad.  This left a confused look on my face and a vague sense of what was to come.  What did he mean? Could he please elaborate?  But, after a while I realized, yet again, my father was teaching me another one of his lessons  -- always think, always learn.

There is not ONE way to be a father. Generally, guys make decisions based on what was done to them (or not done to them). I wish there was an instruction manual for how to be a great dad, but there isn’t. When Nawal told me that we were pregnant, my first thought was, “wow, I hope I’m ready for this.”  Then fear set in. Then my creative mind took me to places I pray never to go to again -- like what if I royally screw up, or what if, God forbid, something bad happens to the baby, or how would we handle any type of birth defect? Ooph! I needed to take a step back, breath, pray and hope for the best. 

On August 5, I witnessed the birth of my beautiful son, and that’s when it happened. An epiphany. It dawned on me: I am no longer priority number one. The most important thing in my life was not myself, but the beautiful baby boy staring up at me.  Every decision I made from here on out was in the best interest of this perfect, precious little life. Naseem was my number one.

Watching Baby Semo (his nickname) grow every day is such a blessing.  My day could be a complete disaster, but the moment I see him, I get this burst of energy and become full of life again. The experience is rewarding, and it makes you more excited for each milestone we’ll all get to experience together. I can’t wait for his first word (I’m hoping for “baba”), to play catch with him, to watch a sporting event with him , school, college, marriage – oh wow! I better stop!

So now, when my friends ask me what’s it’s like to be a dad, I pause, smile, and say “being a father is a great experience, so enjoy it.” I have to thank my own father for setting the bar so high. Thanks Baba. And thanks to my best friend and wife, Nawal for being my better half. And most of all, thank you Semo, for showing me what true happiness is. 

-Nader